What the "Duffy?"

I am so bad at blogging! I'm also bad at any kind of journal writing, and there are some things that really need to be documented! And right now, there really are things that should be written down...you know for posterity sake. So, I'm gonna give this thing another go! Wish me luck! And of course, comments (nice positive comments) are always very motivating:) 

I'm sure as most of you that would ever read this by now know, that we are expecting Baby #3 this summer! We are very excited, and kinda shocked, and scared, and excited! Not that this baby is a surprise, we wanted another baby. But we had to work HARD to get our other two babies, including lots of blood tests, trips to the doctor and infertility medication. This pregnancy happened on it's own, with no outside help. I'm 13 weeks and still kinda in shock! Plus, I haven't been sick at all! I was miserable with the girls. I have been extremely tired, and I do have a major aversion to ground meat. And that is all I will say about that because even the thought of it makes me start gagging and dry-heaving! Gross I know! Otherwise, I almost have to remind myself I'm pregnant since the usual misery of pregnancy sickness isn't ailing me this time around! 

I went to the Doctor on Tuesday for a routine checkup. I was really anxious to get to the Dr. again because I needed that reassurance that all was well with the baby. You know, since I'm not sick! I took my girls with me to the appointment. I still don't know a lot of people here, and you know how Dr appointments go....sometimes you can wait for hours. And that always stresses me out when I farm my kids out to other people. I bribed (or as some would say, I gave them an incentive) to be extra good for me by telling them they could each have $1 to buy something at the dollar store. Best $2 ever spent!!! 

We actually didn't just do the doppler thing to hear the heartbeat, we got to have another ultrasound scan. That was really fun for the girls. I am happy to report that Baby Howard #3 looks more like a baby now than just a blob, and "he" (I'm assuming/hoping this is a boy!) is growing well. He had a good strong heartbeat of 160bpm and was doing little flips for us during the ultrasound. Gracie especially thought that was cool! 

We did however, get some bad news---which is why we got to do another scan--so that was a fun perk! When they did all my blood work a few weeks ago, everything came back looking good....except for my antibody count. I'm sure most of you have heart of the autoimmune issue that comes when Mom had a negative blood type, and Dad had positive blood type. It's call RH and if baby's blood gets mixed with Mom's blood and mom had negative blood and baby has positive blood the body thinks something is attacking it so it creates antibodies that can cause problems in future pregnancies. Easy remedy for that is the Rogam shot. It's not a problem these days for the parents to have different blood types because of this. 

Well, that is not our problem. Both Bryant and I  have positive blood types so we don't have to worry about getting Rogam shots. However, there is another thing in your blood called "Duffy." Don't worry, nobody else has ever heard of it before either! It's super uncommon. Like 1 in 700,000 people have this or something. But (un)lucky for me, I have Duffy.  Now, I'm not sure I'm completely explaining this correctly, but this is what I understand anyway. I must be "Duffy Negative" and Bryant must be "Duffy Positive" and probably when I was pregnant with Kate, her "duffy positive" blood got mixed with my "duffy negative" blood and caused antibodies to be created. Very similar to the RH thing. The problem is, there is no easy fix like with RH. They don't have a "Rogam" shot or an "Anti-Duffy" shot to combat the antibodies for this. The issue is the antibodies can cross the placenta and attack babies red blood cells. This can cause the baby to become extremely anemic and can affect oxygen flow though the baby during development. Worst case scenario is the baby will have to receive blood transfusions right after birth. 

So, I have been referred to a Perinatal Specialist (High Risk OBGYN) to check this out. I feel extremely blessed because my brother-in-law, Rich, is a High Risk OB in Boise. As soon as I found out about this, I texted Bryant and then I texted Rich. And he is such a good guy, he called me right away to talk to me about it. I really really appreciated that. He didn't seem nearly as concerned about it as my regular OB did, which also made me feel better. 

I have an appointment with the Perinatal Specialist next Friday. Bryant is going with me, and Rich said they will do a blood test on Bryant to make sure he has "duffy positive" and they will continue to do blood tests on me once a month to check my levels. If my levels go up higher than what they are now, they will most likely be doing scans of the baby every month or so to make sure all is well still. 

That's all I know for now. I hope to know more next Friday. I wish my Mom was closer than she is since we will have to leave our house to get to our early appointment at like 6:45am and I'm not sure what to do with my kids. I could take them with us (but I'd rather not) and they both have school that day. Oh well, I'll figure it out! 

Thanks for reading my very very long post after a long LONG time of nothing on here! I hope this wasn't super boring! Now I gotta think of something interesting to blog about for all of you who endured this whole thing! 

Happy Valentine's Day!

Surgery

I know I have been such a slacker when it comes to updating this blog. I have a lot to catch up on. Like my Grandmother's funeral, Gracie turning 4, Bryant starting a training program to get a special certification that will take 2 1/2 years to complete, Kate turning 2, Halloween, etc etc.

However, right now I am just going to update on everyone about the surgery I just had. I am still unclear on some of the details as I was MAJORLY drugged up when the Dr. came to talk to me and Bryant had already left.

Last year I found a Dr. in Houston that I went to see. I have had a lot of stomach issues in the past. I had surgery 14 years ago, and it was awful. Spending 10 days in the hospital, having a blood transfusion, being unable to keep anything down and consequently getting severely dehydrated, having to have a balloon put down my throat to open a passage for food and water to pass through, etc. It wasn't exactly what I had expected.

I have continued to have issues. I'm very sensitive to certain foods. I have been extremely anemic since that time, at one point a few years ago having to see an Oncologist to get my iron levels to a safe point, not to mention the amount of weight I have gained. I do not eat more than any other person. In fact I eat quite a bit less, so why would I continue to gain weight?

The latest problem has been that out of nowhere I will feel kind of sick to my stomach and then all of the sudden it feels like all of my insides are being squeezed as hard as they can. I can't hardly breath, I can't sit, lay down, walk, I pretty much think I am going to die. It only lasts about 3 minutes or so, but it seems like 3 hours.

Okay, so onto surgery. After seeing this Dr for a year, and having all kinds of tests done and an endoscopy and an upper GI, etc etc, and after satisfying the insurance company with all the information they want (cause obviously, the people who work for insurance companies have all gone to medical school!), Dr. Nowzardan was able to convince them that I really needed surgery to fix some of these problems.

What was suppose to be a laparoscopic procedure however, turned into major surgery. Instead of 3 one inch incisions, I have a HUGE 12 inch vertical incision down my stomach from my sternum to my belly button as well as 2 huge drainage tube wounds.

Now, you have to understand, this Dr/Surgeon, is one of the best in the country. People come from all over to see him. He is very very good at what he does, and I trust him. He felt like there would be no problem doing a laparoscopic procedure on me. However, when he got in there (and this is where I get a little fuzzy on all the details) he said the surgery that had been done 14 years ago was done very badly and that my intestines were a huge tangled mess. He had to open me to fix me.

So, that's where we are at. I have had a really hard time being so laid up. I was planning to be at church today. I figured I would be sore for a few days and I'd have to be careful, but it was so much more invasive than that. I got to come home from the ICU on Thursday but I had to bring a drainage tube with me. SO GROSS. I hate the stupid thing. It is so painful and so disgusting and I cannot wait until Wednesday to get it out!

So, that is the story. Bryant has taken excellent care of me. I can't lift anything. I can't even stand up for long periods of time. I do try to walk and move as often as I can, but I am unable to care for me kids. I can't bend down, I can't lift anything over 5 lbs, I need help with almost everything. Luckily, not only did I marry the most amazing man on the planet, but I have the most amazing friends too. My friend Erin picked me up from the hospital since Bryant had to work. We have had dinner brought in, my friend Shari came and stayed with me all day on Friday to watch my kids and take care of me while Bryant was at work, my friend Jessica is coming tomorrow to do the same. I've had friends take care of my kids while I was in the hospital and my friend Christie is taking Gracie today and letting her spend the night since her daughter and Gracie are such good friends. I've had friends bring me movies and magazines to entertain me. They've even cleaned my house. Plus, my brother and sister (in law) send me flowers. I am overwhelmed with the love I have been shown.

Everyday gets a little better. I'm sore. I'm SO SO SO SORE. But I'm not nearly as sore today as I have been. So if I can just make it until Wednesday I can get the stitches and the drainage tube out and I will feel so much better.

It's Thanksgiving week this week, and it's fitting to say, I have A LOT to be Thankful for this year. A good Dr who knew how to fix me the right way, a wonderful husband who loves me and has taken such good care of me, amazing friends who have gone above and beyond, and of course of Wednesday I will be so thankful to have the drainage tube out:) (Can you tell I HATE THIS THING?!) I'm also very Thankful that as soon as my Mom and Dad found out that what was suppose to be more minor laparoscopic surgery turned into a very big deal, they got on and bought a plane ticket for my Mom to come help me. She'll be here tomorrow. You know, having her come might....maybe....be worth going through all of this! I love my Mom (and my Dad who is coming Dec. 1)! YAY!

That's what I know so far. I'm sure I can get more information when I go back to the Dr. Thank you for all the prayers and the well wishes!

Bisous to all of you!
April

Family Pictures

My friend Allison does photography as a side business. Here are a few of the shots she got of my insanely beautiful family! What do you think? Which ones to you like best? And if you're in Beaumont, I highly recommend Allison for all your photo needs! She is wonderful with kids, she knows good spots in town to do pictures, and she has excellent prices! 

Dance Recital

Gracie has been in Dance Class since September and they have practiced their routine for Dance Recital all year! They finally had their big day in May! They did awesome!  when you think these are 2.5 to 3 year old kids that did this, I think they did exceptional! They did their routine to the song  "Day-O" and had the cutest costumes! They cost a fortune, but they were cute! Here is a video of the tech rehearsal (we couldn't take video of the actual performance, and this was the best I got! I got a little distracted but you can still see it! Gracie is the 3rd from the left...the tallest one in the class) There is also,a picture of my little dancer all dressed up and a picture of her entire class!

We are Alive and Well!

I know it's Been FOREVER since my last post. But I've had several requests for an update, which makes me feel that perhaps my blogging isn't in vain. Plus, since I'm the worst mother in the world and don't have baby books even started for my kids, this is good for me to write down things about them too right? I'll just give a brief update on some events in the past few months, and then I'll post about our Family Reunion/Vegas Trip, our House, Gracie's Dance Recital and our trip to Austin we took this past weekend! The end of March Bryant's sister and her family that live in Fort Worth came to visit us! Gracie absolutely LOVED having her cousins around. I hope they her cousins will continue to be important to her and become her best friends as she and Kate grow up. I have learned all too well, friends come and go, but you will always have your family in your life! Bryant's Mom and little sister Maren had actually gone to Ft. Worth to visit Pamela and family as well, so they were here for a few days as well. I'm afraid there isn't as many things to do here in Beaumont as there are in the DFW area, but we really enjoyed having them come for a visit. We did take a day and go to the NASA Johnson Space Center in Houston though, which we all really enjoyed it!

Maren with Ava and Gracie at NASA
 
             Grace and Kate at NASA
             

 April was my Birthday Month of course! And let me tell you, it was FABULOUS! I was really nervous about turning 30 last year, and it didn't start out all that well. It was probably the crappiest birthday I had ever had in fact. Besides my parents who sent me flowers, nobody really gave a care that it was my birthday, which in years past would have been okay, but since I was so unhappy about being 30 a little birthday cheer would have been nice. However, all that is now a distant memory because this year as I turned 31, I had the BEST BIRTHDAY EVER! First of all, I got to host our first monthly BUNCO Night for the ladies at church which turned out super awesome! Bryant took the girls out that night for me, and they came home with a new Kindle Fire for me! Which I have LOVED! SOme of my wonderful friends here totally threw a surprise birthday party for me! And it was a surprise too! I have no idea how they pulled this off, but it was so fun. They had a "French theme" and everything! I felt spoiled the entire month with little things here and there, and i have to say, being in my "30's" has been FABULOUS! I would never to back! We've kept busy with dance class, vacations, baseball games, temple trips, working on projects in our house and yard, playing outside, etc this summer so far! Bryant's job is going well, we love our house, our girls are growing like weeds, and life in general has been good to us!
 
Gracie being playing outside being silly!
 
Kate after a long morning fell asleep before I could even give her lunch!

Inspired by One Very Special Little Girl

I've been a mother for just barely over 3 1/2 years now. I have come to understand over these past 3 1/2 years what an important responsibility I have as a mother, to teach my children. Not only to teach them how to care for themselves, how to count, the alphabet, etc, etc, but to implement the gospel in our home as an everyday part of life. I want my children to know why they are here, where they came from, and what the purpose of this life is for them.
I feel grateful to be able to stay home with them and work on this a little each day.

I guess I didn't fully understand how special, how strong, how sweet, how simply wonderful my little Gracie was until this past week. She has truly inspired me. I have focused so much on what I need to teach HER, that I guess I forgot how much SHE teaches ME. This past week has really opened my eyes.

Gracie did one of the hardest things in her very young life. She gave up her Binky. Now, before many of you go judging me, and her, let me simply say--you don't know the situation or WHY she still struggled with having a binky at 3 1/2 years old. I bet if you made your 2-3 year old move around and live in 6 different places in less than a year and a half your child would be dealing with some issues as well. Unfortunately, with all the change, the uncertainty, and the lack of control she felt she had in her life, her Binky became her security blanket. It wasn't so much a binky to her as it was her lovey thing. Her comfort, the thing that gave her a sense of peace and security. So please, keep the judgemental comments to yourself if you have them!

Anyway, we've been talking to her for a while about getting rid of her binky. We've tried a few times before, but it was never successful. But last week, she found this Beauty and the Beast baby doll and matching stroller she really really really wanted. I thought it was expensive for a childs toy. So right there in the store we talked about it for a good 20 min or so, and she agreed if I bought her the doll and stroller, she would give up her binky. She also said if she didn't I could take it back to the store.

We came home and Bryant was here. She told Bryant all about her new doll and giving up her binky. She decided it would be a good idea to send her binky to Santa Clause and he would take it to Parker's (our nephew, her cousin) new baby sister Brynn.
So, Bryant got an envelope and she wrote out (in 3 year old giberish of course) what he told her to. She addressed it to Santa Clause, put a return name on it, wrote a letter explaining what he was to do with it, drew on a stamp and put it in the mail. And it was gone.

Well, Gracie did really good. She went to sleep without it! First time EVER she's gone to sleep without the binky. But of course she woke up a while later crying for it. Well, she didn't acutally ask for it. She wanted to. She really really wanted to. She sat on my lap shaking (I think she was literally going through a detox from it) and just cried and cried. And I just held her and told her how proud I was of her. At one point she said through sobs "I want my B, B, B" she wanted to say binky so bad--I know she did, but instead she said "my B-Baby." Oh what a brave little girl!

It took a few nights of getting use to, but she did it! She got rid of her Binky! She is such a big girl. And I saw what a strong spirit she has going through this. She was determined. She was sad, but she knew she had made a promise to get rid of the binky. It's no wonder she, and all the other little children were saved for these days. If anyone can make it through the trials and adversity in todays world, it's these precious children.

Through the first few difficult days, she would often come find me, or crawl up in my lap and say "Momma, I love you. You're my best friend."

I feel so honored to be your Momma Gracie Girl! There is a lot I can learn from you. I love you so much!